Raising a teen does not have to be frustrating. Most parents simply do not have the right tools for the job. Here are three tools are teen parents can use to strengthen their cooperation and develop mutual respect:
Teen Tool # 1: "Job Description" is a tool that parents will ensure that children understand what is expected of them if they have a chore or work at home. Just like in the office, parents can write a "job description" that details what is expected ofthem. This reduces power struggles and conflicts during and after the job is done. Parents must be sure not to be condescending to children, especially older children, when writing out. And more details or steps may be necessary for younger children than older children. A thorough job description is, who do the work, when to do it, how it is done and where it should be done, if applicable.
Teen tool # 2: A "parent-child contract" means an agreement between aParent and child (note), the unique tension that sets up secure an exchange of desired behavior for the desired rewards. The agreement should not only what to do, the child, but what he or she can expect to receive in return. Make the behavior of the exchange achieved simply and easily. Write a summary, what, when, where, how and to place it where the child can see it. , To sign it official and then change it on a weekly basis to fine-tune the agreement. Was it too difficult?Did you need to change when and where it occurs? Do you need a child to teach how the expected task? In the event that you have more than one child, write a separate contract for each child, every child is unique abilities and personality. The democratic style of parenting seen every member of the family as "equal" in terms of their right to respect and dignity, but not in relation to their responsibilities and functions. Use the baseline parenting tool above beforeInitial parenting and problem-solving tool below to control free of any hearing difficulties listed.
Teen Tool # 3: "Negotiation" is a powerful educational tool for older children. Although some parents will need to use this tool earlier than others, depending on the personality of the child, all parents will find this tool valuable in their interactions with their children. Negotiation is a tool that allows for a win / win situation between two parties that did not occuralready agree with each other. It includes several steps:
- To know what is negotiable and not negotiable. Knowing what is negotiable and what is not negotiable is useful in devising a compromise. This firmly establishes a bar or restrict parents to a theme. The parents must make sure to be realistic as well as businesses.
- Open-mindedness. Be prepared to listen and consider the other persons point of view. If the child of parents already feel his or her mind, then made argument is a farce and the child is rightly angry and upset.
- To set a time limit. Keep it short, the discussion of wandering down a "rabbit trail", or go to the parties is prevented. Keep things on the topic at hand and to the point.
- Keep It Private. What does not embarrass the older child to negotiate in a public place. They tend to be what they think others think of responding to them. She also holds one-to-become one> Prevent power plays from developing countries, by other people join the negotiations, either for or against the parents.
- Stay calm and cool. Do not try to negotiate, and when angry, tired or busy with other things. It's hard to remain rational when other thoughts and feelings are pushing for more attention. If the situation is heated up a "cool down time-out" and then talks. Set this up as a general rule, before the hand, when a heated discussion is expected.
--Acknowledge the other points. Even if they totally off base to identify the other persons point. They are obviously important that the person, even if they are irrational. This will also encourage positive relations and cooperation if the final solution is found and not back stabbing and sabotage.
Formulate - the "Final Solution". Reaffirming the resolution of the negotiations will ensure that all parties to it, what has been agreed, is clear. There is the possibilitynot following the resolution of mis-communication.
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